It’s 3pm. The house is in chaos, you’ve been busy all day and somehow achieved nothing.
Or you’ve already had a nap with your little one and its only 12.15pm. What on earth will fill the rest of the day? What chores should you do? Or what activities should you be doing with your lil one? It’s a strange, strange world this stay at home mummy thing. I’m only coming to grips with it all after 2 years. Up until now I have put so much pressure on myself to spend the time wisely, and to get it ‘all’ done. There was this constant pull of ‘what I should be doing instead’. When I played with my boy, I felt I should tackle the dishes. When I tackled the dishes I felt bad I wasn’t having a tea party with my boy. It’s the pull in many different directions that is the unravelling of me at times. I want to achieve it all and I just didn't know where to start. I felt like I was going in circles, achieving nothing and slipping into overwhelm.
Recently I have begun reading up on Waldorf ways and methods for little ones days and learning. There’s a lot written about rhythms and IN BREATHS and OUT BREATHS for children. Making sure there is a balance between focus and freedom each day. I am a fan of rhythms and routines for children, because I know children take comfort and feel safe knowing what’s coming. So the 'in breath' and 'out breath' was a nice addition to this, and it helped me get a better balance of time spent with child vs time spent doing something by myself while he played by himself (and not feel guilty about it!). I began to think of how this could relate to what I needed to achieve through the day. Could I bring balance (and less stress) to my day, my lists, and my needs by using this philosophy? So I began to use the basic rhythm structure for our mornings and then listened to what breath I needed in any moment – and of course what is going to work with Mr toddler. (There’s no point trying to take an in breath if he also needs one (because for him that requires my complete attention.)) We have a morning routine of sorts: Stories and snuggles, stretches/yoga (for me), breakfast, a couple of quick chores then outside time before snack and nap/or lunch (depending on what’s needed). So now I simply listen to what sort of breath I feel I need, or Mr Toddler needs, or what we both need. This might mean more stories and snuggles after breakfast or just stepping outside with Mr Toddler for some big wake up breathing instead of yoga stretches (because being bounced upon by a tot is not really so relaxing).
(Yup. The above image is TOTALLY me and TOTALLY how I look in the mornings!)
These 'breaths' have become like sub-groups within our daily routine. They have provided us both with an outline of the day, but enough flexibility to not feel restricted and entrapped by it. Within one part of our routine, I can choose to breath in or out. If it's outside time I can choose to garden (in breath) or sit and create a nature mandala (out breath), while still keeping the rhythm flowing.
It’s working well so far…and no it still doesn’t ALL get done, but I don’t stress about it anymore, because there will always be another breath to take. Here are some examples of my in and out breath activities: (note - these do not always correspond to the toddlers in and out breath activities)
If you want to read a description of the Waldorf rhythms and breaths for children you can find one here:
http://sydneysteiner.com/tag/waldorf-rhythm/ p.s come join the Creative and Calm Mumma's facebook group to chat about how you find calm...and how we can get creating for calm. p.p.s Like the idea of doodling to take an out breath? Sign up below to get a free 8 -day doodling journey to get you started :)
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